Having recently taken a closer look at the phrase "guys are pigs" and the unfortunate choice of words, there are still other anti-guy lines that females like to utter. One of them - "guys are stupid" - was asked to be taken literally by my friend Anita. And take it literally I shall!
So, "guys are stupid." Fair enough. However, roughly half of all doctors are men. Given that going through medical school is no small feat, we can assume that the men successfully leaving medical school are intelligent on some fundamental level. Now, since the number of female and male doctors are fairly close, we can assume that men and women are equally stupid (or equally intelligent, if you choose to be optimistic about it).
But what if, somehow, Anita didn't really mean for me to take it literally and was referring to a more...metaphorical stupidity? What if men are stupid not because of intelligence but because of their "common sense" and their inability to understand the female mind and sentiment?
Unfortunately, still problematic.
Saying guys are stupid for not grasping "what women want" is, in a sense, kind of like calling a mountain climber a failure for not making it to the top of Mt. Everest. It's not an impossible feat, but it's a bit unfair. Perhaps it's not entirely the guy's fault that he cannot read all the "signals"; maybe, just maybe, the women are being overly complex.
Currently, many girls operate at the same level as the Sunday New York Times crossword puzzle: full of obscure/vague clues and pop culture references (31 across: 18 letter word(s) for 'Boomer's update of a 1962 Neil Sedaka hit?' - and don't cheat!). Many men can maybe solve a Thursday puzzle of a woman - no small feat in itself - but then the Sunday girls say, "Solve me!" and expect immediate results. Honestly, I don't think most girls understand each other, either.
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Let's look at some other lines as well.
First up, "guys suck." This intelligently-worded insight into mankind is conditionally true. Yes, guys suck...when we breathe in. We also suck when we are imbibing a liquid through a straw. Or enjoying a lollipop.
The act of "sucking" can also be referring to an act of homosexuality or "experimentation" on the guy's part. But, given the proliferation of heterosexual relationships in the world, females technically "suck" more than guys do.
Additionally, girls also say "guys are dense." Yes, it is true we are dense. So is any matter, really. Both males and females have roughly the same density as water, which is to say, not very dense at all. This somewhat light density is why we can float (but just barely) when we lie on our backs. Women, then, are basically as dense as men.
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This is not to say that none of these statements are true, but rather they can often include women as well. Perhaps we should say, instead, that "people are stupid" (whether in their inability to understand or their stubborn obscuring of the ability to understand); "people suck" (in more ways than one); and "people are dense" (roughly that of water).
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2 comments:
--do not try to use your witty psuedo logic and questionable assumptions to do battle against a pokemon whose cuteness levels alone would be enough to melt your cold mechanical heart were she to unleash her maximum capacity love attack!
you scientists disgust me, trying to understand women by such means, whereas it is quite obvious that such a creature as she mentioned follows not your reason, but a far superior force of feminine mysticism of the heart that, when grasped, does indeed show us men to be stupid, dense, and addicted to the act of sucking with respect to its many meanings.
wait though, you're talking about small/'big' anita with the cute cheeks, right?
feminine mysticism be damned! i am a slave to pseudo logic and questionable assumptions! it was probably because, as a child, i suffered a traumatic experience at the hands of a 'hardy boys' book, a paperclip, and a ferruginous pygmy owl that has ingrained in me my nonsensically sensical reasoning.
and yes, it's that anita.
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